“Are you dying? Are you going to heaven, mummy?”
Those were the words of Surrey resident and single mom Preet Brar’s son.
Brar said her now 25-year-old son started asking questions when her kidney failed in August 2024.
“My son, he has global developmental delays, moderate intellectual delays, epilepsy, diabetes,” Brar said. “He’s having a very hard time understanding.”
Brar’s health struggles began in 2001 while she was 23 weeks pregnant. Her blood pressure rose to dangerous levels and both of her kidneys failed, resulting in her son being born at just 1.1 pounds.
“His eyes were still closed,” Brar recalled. “He was in an incubator.”
She remained on dialysis for six and a half years while waiting for a transplant in Canada.
As an O-positive patient, she faced long wait times and repeated delays.
In 2007, Brar received a kidney transplant outside the country.
The transplant lasted 17 years until 2022, when she experienced experienced acute kidney failure and was once again hospitalized.
While in treatment, she contracted COVID pneumonia and was transferred to Vancouver General Hospital for treatment.
“I almost died,” she said.
Since then, Brar has been back on dialysis three to four times a week.
She described the treatment process as physically exhausting, often leaving her in severe pain from muscle cramping.
On May 17 of this year, Brar found herself back in emergency care and was once again reminded of the urgency of needing another transplant.
One of her biggest fears is what could happen to her son if she cannot find a donor.
“With a special-needs kids, you usually have to find another family,” she said, noting that preparing for the worst-case scenario is often in the back of her mind.
Friends encouraged her to share her story publicly online in hopes of finding a kidney donor, even though she was initially hesitant.
As her search continues, Brar tries to remain positive.
“If I look around, there’s still many wonderful things around me I can focus on.”
People interested in learning more about kidney donation for Brar must be a blood type match and can contact Vancouver Coastal Health kidney donor nurse Jovana Bosiljcic at kidneydonornurse@vch.ca and reference file number 8111.