With holiday ornaments packed away, Christmas trees chipped and New Year’s champagne guzzled, Islanders from Port Hardy to Victoria are setting resolutions in the hopes of improving their lives.
But as January edges on, pricey gym memberships will undoubtedly go unused, strict diets will be broken and lofty goals will fall by the wayside ignored, neglected and overlooked.
“This is very common,” said Frederick Grouzet, an associate professor of psychology at the University of Victoria, who has spent much of the last two decades investigating the structure and origins of goals and values. “Setting a goal is good, it’s easy, but maintaining a goal or attaining it – it’s very difficult.”
But that doesn’t mean dreams of getting in shape, strengthening friendships or finding a better job should be tossed aside – they just need tweaking.
Grouzet explains that when picking New Year’s resolutions, it’s crucial to find a “self-relevant” goal.
That’s the key.
“It’s something that you choose personally for you, not to please others, not because it’s something that you told others that you are going to do,” he said.
“Choose what works the best for you, and don’t feel like you’re forced to maintain it. If you maintain it, it’s good. If not, that means that maybe it was not the right goal.”
That means ditching plans to increase your step count by playing 18 holes twice per week if the thought of golf makes you yawn, or abandoning that trendy pescatarian diet your partner has been pushing if you can’t stand the taste of fish.
“If you don’t do it for yourself, then, yes, you will fail,” said Grouzet.
The professor adds that living up to resolutions requires picking ones that are specific and actionable.
“A goal without a plan – it’s a dream, it’s a fantasy,” he said.
Take, for example, someone’s plan to run the TC10K in April. Though sprinting triumphantly across the finish line is certainly a goal, Grouzet says it’s not specific enough.
Instead, he explains, train to run 10 kilometers starting in January by first walking five kilometers, then running farther and farther every week until you’re ready for the race. That’s a specific goal – one that’s easier to stick to.Contingencies are just as important.
“Very often when we set a goal and then we make plans – we make plans almost like everything will be ideal, everything will be OK,” said Grouzet. “But actually, there are a lot of things that could happen, and so we tend to not make what we could call plan Bs.”
If jogging twice per week is your New Year’s resolution, you need plans in place to ensure you can keep at it even if it’s pouring outside, catch a week-long flu or temporarily lose motivation.
That could require getting a gym pass to use a treadmill on rainy days, setting ground rules that missed jogs mean an extra run the following week or buying a few dumbbells to strengthen your legs at home when you don’t feel like venturing outside.
But Grouzet says people shouldn’t feel too pressured if they don’t have a New Year’s goal.
“Don’t feel forced,” he said. “If you feel that you have to do it, then that would be much more difficult, and you will fail, for sure.
“So first step, do it if you want, and then choose what works the best for you.”